I noticed a headline in today’s Statesman as I was waiting to get my morning caffeine dose. Apparently, someone in this year’s Hands On A Hard Body competition in Longview snapped during the competition, walked to a K-Mart across the street, threw a trash can through the front window, went to the sporting goods section, got a shotgun and some shells and proceeded to shoot himself in the head.

There’s an unfortunate typo in the description of the contest, but I’m not sure if it’s the Statesman or Longview News-Journal’s fault or if it’s only in the online version.

In this annual contest, contestants try to keep one hand on a new truck at a Nissan dealership in Longview for as long as possible. The winner gets the truck. Last year’s winner hung on for 117 consecutive hours. This was the contest’s 13th year.

Rules:

• There are 24 competitors.
• Contestants must live within 100 miles of the Longview area.
• No gun chewing or nicotine products allowed.
• No leaning, squatting, sitting or lying down.
• 5-minute breaks every hour. Every eight hours, there is a 15-minute break.

Update: I guess I should’ve taken a screenshot, becuse they’ve fixed it. It was there. Really. I’m not that sick. No, really.