The environment around Austin is turning the holiday season on its ear; the weather outside is delightful, but the fires are soooooo frightful. Austin, along with much of Texas, is suffering through quite a dry spell that has brought on extreme drought conditions. There’s no rain in sight, so it’s going to be a very dry start to 2006.

The drought has already produced painful consequences around Austin, including a grass fire in Creedmore, overuse of the word “tinderbox,” and a Rick Perry surfacing. As an aside, many of Rick’s appearances the past few months have involved disastrous declarations, which sets a nice tone for his re-election campaign — Rick Perry: Master of Disaster.

Anyway, despite the obvious hazards involved with extreme droughts, idiots statewide continue to wreak havoc by defying burn bans. New Years Eve will be an especially trying time since people (including the City of Austin) feel compelled to display their pyrotechnic wizardry in celebration of an arbitrary calendar date. The culmination of First Night festivities should be a safe and dazzling display over the river, but those staying home would do well to keep one hand on the hose when the armchair explosives expert next door starts up with the Roman Candles.