We just found out that Iron Gate Studios is hosting its 2nd annual Prom fundraising event this Saturday, and guess what—we’re dateless (Using the royal “we’re dateless,” sounds a lot less pathetic than “i’m dateless.”). I’m not even sure if I’ll be able to attend, but if I could attend, it would be a lot more fun to have somebody to dance with while I was wearing my blue ruffled tuxedo shirt. But no worries, because tonight from 8-10 Iron Gate is holding a prom date auction at the Long Branch Inn (1133 E. 11th St.) featuring some of Austin’s “finest men and women”—which we (I) hope means not some people standing on street corners holding up cardboard signs or even members of Austin’s finest, however comely they may be. They will be total nubile hotties. Even if you have a potential date, you may just want to go tonight to see if you could bid up to something better, and avoid the awkward rejections and pitiful glances.

The prom itself will be graced with the presence of Travis County’s premier Journey cover band (are there more than one?) Odyssey. According to their MySpace page, they rock. Austin legend John Erler will be straining at the upper levels of his low vocal range to “faithfully” match the inimitable Steve Perry. Ironic or not, everybody has fun at a prom. If I can get a date, I will see you there.